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"I don't have time to die... I'm too busy!"
Goge Vandire was the former Ecclesiarch and Master of Administratum during the Age of Apostasy. He gained his position through threats and assassination, and lead the Imperium during the period known as the "Reign of Blood."

Official Canon Edit

Goge Vandire rose to the position as head of the Administratum in the 36th Millennium, during the age of Apostasy, and promised to challenge the corruption of the growing Ecclesiarchy. He placed his own puppet in the position, until he outlived his usefulness and was replaced by Vandire himself. With this newfound power, he began purging his rivals in the Ecclesiarchy and seized control of both the Frateris Militia and the near entirety of the bureaucracy. He also brought in an obscure cult known as the Daughters of the Emperor as his personal bodyguards, convincing them that he was blessed by the Emperor when one of them failed to kill him (though he didn't tell him that it was his Rosarius and not the Emperor's will that protected him).

Vandire's tyranny and bloodlust grew with his paranoia; it wasn't until he attacked the Black Templars that an organized response was formed. A coalition of Astartes, the Adeptus Mechanicus, and a reformist priest named Sebastian Thor was formed to challenge Vandire by invading Terra. Despite their combined power, they were unable to dislodge the Brides of the Emperor from the Imperial Palace. It was then that the Adeptus Custodes intervened, as they brought their leader Alicia Dominica to the throne room to see the Emperor himself. Enraged by learning the truth of her master, she branded him a heretic and personally beheaded him, bringing his reign to an end.

His death would heralded and end to the age of apostasy, the reformation of the Ecclesiarchy, the reformation of the Brides of the Emperor into the Sisters of Battle. He was succeeded as Ecclesiarch by Sebastian Thor (who continued the Imperium's trend of fiddling the rules to keep the Sisters of Battle around as an army as they were not "men under arms").

TTS Canon Edit

"And then you let some power-hungry motherfucking bureaucrat become the head of the Adminastritum, and that overly dominant Ecclesiarchy Groxshit. Effectively controlling all our hot leathery assassins from the Officio Assassinorum and all arsehole psykers in the Adeptus Astra Telepathica! Oh and our flashlight guys as well."

-The Man Emperor of Mankind

The Emperor becomes privy to the activities of Goge Vandire in Episode 3 after Kitten reveals to him the events that transpired during the age of Apostasy. The Emperor promptly rants about the stupidity as to both how the secular Imperium allowed the Ecclisarchy to come about and then how they could allow it to grow so powerful and then be controlled by Goge Vandire who he believes has the most evil name he ever heard, in addition to murdering anyone because 'it turned Vandire on'.

Kitten however reveals his role in assisting the resistance against Vandire by directing Alicia Dominica to the Emperor and attempting to convince her that Vandire was damaging the Imperium. With remarkably very little persuasion, thanks in large parts to the Emperors rotting corpse making it so his rib cage looked like abs against his stretched skin. She then proceeded to read out her famous cannon speech to him and he in turned responded in kind with his equally hilarious final words.

Goge Vandire appears later in the April Fools special, apparently being one of FUCKING Horus's choice allies which would assist him in overthrowing the Emperor.

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